Friday, July 16, 2010

here's the goofy idea i had

Dear Mr. Gander,

I’ve enjoyed seeing you and your family over the last couple of months. You have a lovely family and a beautiful home and it has been my pleasure to make your acquaintance.

I’m writing to ask a small favor of you, kind sir. Tomorrow as I pass you and your family by the road would it be possible for you to not hiss at me?

I understand that you have reason to distrust strangers encroaching on your personal space. Parents must be cautious and protective of their children and we do live in a treacherous land where life is not always treated as valuable. I know too that you have endured a terrible loss to your family unit. I saw the feathers scattered by the water’s edge. I get that. I offer you my most sincere sympathies.

Still, I feel that at this point in our neighborly relationship we should be able to get beyond the distrust. If trust is not something you are willing to consider for personal reasons, perhaps you could consider the fact that your home is roughly 2 miles into my trip and by the time I reach you I’m drenched in sweat and gasping for breath. At this point I wouldn’t be able to chase you or your offspring even if I tried.

I assure you I am no threat to you or your kin. In fact, if you find yourself flying over my house in the fall, please accept my invitation to stop in for a rest and a light snack. My wife and children would be delighted to meet you.

All the best,

P.S. Keep your eye on the white haired guy with the large dog.






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