When I told people I was going to have a daughter everyone warned me that I was "in for it".
I assumed they meant that I would spend the rest of my days worrying over this impossibly adorable little girl and her life decisions. I figured they were referring to the mental turmoil I would undergo when she finally turns 40 and I allow her to date. I thought they were talking about how this little girl would wrap me around her finger and have me jumping to assist her with a flick of her eyelash.
I expected those types of things.
I did not expect that they meant acrobatic dives off of the backs of furniture. I did not expect she would be diving face first into wood chips just for the fun of it. I did not expect showers of shattered glass all over the living room floor.