Let me preface this by admitting I have not read the book The Summer I Turned Pretty. As a 53 year old man, I understand that I am not the preferred demographic and I only watched the streaming series because a couple of students twisted my arm and my 16 year old daughter said we should watch it together while she recovered from surgery.
So, there I was, sitting in my spot on the couch with a small dog sleeping beside me, my daughter sitting in the recliner and The Summer I Turned Pretty streaming on the TV. We were pretty deep in the first season, maybe even starting the second season when my daughter looked over at me and said, “It’s no fun watching this with you because you’re such a dad.” We both erupted in laughter.
She was right and I had realized that just before she said it. She made me rewind a couple of parts she thought were emotional and she watched me sit through each part again completely stone-faced and unmoved. There she was, on the verge of tears and there I was looking at a male lead character and calling him a loser.
Violet read the book a few summers ago and think I recall some excitement from her when the show started airing on a streaming service. I didn’t pay much attention and certainly had no desire to watch a young adult romance series. In the summers since, she and I have watched a myriad of things, some sarcastic, some serious, some goofy and some romantic. I’ve kept an open mind to most of her suggestions, even watching a buddy comedy movie starring SZA recently. (It actually wasn’t bad.)
When I told her that a couple of students had suggested I watch it, she pounced. This was going to be our new show. She cued up the first episode and I agreed to give it a chance. A couple of weeks later, we were all caught up and waiting on the next episode to drop. It was clear, however, that we were not watching the same show.
At 16 and female, this story was written for her. I can suspend my old male-ness enough to understand why this story appeals to teenage girls. The two lead male characters with abs are easy on the eyes and have just enough personality to pass as romantic interests. The girl is young in every way and seems pleasant enough in the first episode. It’s immediately obvious where this is headed.
I’ll assume you’ve seen it or read it, but I’ll try not to spoil anything.
Conrad is one of the guys, the oldest of the two brothers. He’s brooding and troubled and while I see that the girl is into him, I can’t help but see Conrad through the eyes of the father of a teenage girl. Brooding, red flag. Troubled, red flag. Smoking pot and underage drinking, red flag, red flag. I see this guy showing up at my door to date my daughter and I would send him packing. At the very least, I’d put the fear of God in him.
The other brother is no better at the beginning and the more we learn about him, the more red flags he collects. I would actively try to talk my daughter out of being interested in either of these goons. “I majored in beer-ology!” Really, dude? Grow up and stay away from my daughter.
We often speak up during these shows, laughing and making jokes with one another. I do not hold back, hoping to use these as teaching moments. I point out the character flaws, the red flags and warning signs in the hopes that Violet will notice them in real life when she sees them. She is quite aware but she’s also obviously “team Conrad”. There’s no arguing this with her. I point to the flags and shut up. And admittedly, the writers tried to make him more respectable in the third season.
But wait, who’s this other guy? An actual nice guy enters the story. One with no immediate red flags. He’s kind, genuine and honest, and of course, within a few episodes he’s dumped. He’s Cam Cameron, every dad’s dream guy, but no match for the forces of teen drama character tropes. I call attention to Cam Cameron and Violet just smiles and says, “Well, yeah”, totally not interested in this guy she knows is just a side salad. I declare my love for him and she tells me I’m not going to be happy with what happens to his character. But she doesn’t need to tell me. I already know.
Cam Cameron suffers the fate of every “nice guy” by losing out to the local brooding “bad boy”. I mean, on one level, I can understand why some young ladies want to run after the troubled hot guy so they can save him and turn him into a decent guy. But on another level, why buy a fixer-upper when there’s a move-in-ready dude who’s already actively courting you? Cam Cameron will make you a better person by being an equal partner. He will make sure the rent is paid, he’ll pick up the kids from school and he won’t forget your birthday (or your corsage). The fixer-upper will always have his own drama and the lady will always be a side character in his life. By the way, I don’t have unresolved bitterness from young love, you do! Can you tell that an ex once dumped me because I was “too nice”? Too nice? Like, you wanted me to be mean to you? So, yeah, maybe I’m a bit triggered when Cam Cameron just disappears from the story after never doing anything except helping everyone around him and making everyone’s lives better.
I guess nice is so unromantic, right? It’s better to have abs than a decent personality. I know, I know, that’s not what Jenny Han was trying to communicate to a generation of teens, but dang, it’s pretty well implied.
I love a good happy ending and I fully expect the unlikeable lead female to end up with the lesser of the two evil brothers. That’s the ending this story suggests we need to feel good at the end. But where’s my sequel where Cam Cameron finds a woman who realizes that he’s actually the best guy in town? Where he finds his pure love totally reciprocated and where he gets his story told? You know, about how it actually pays to be nice and treat women with respect? How good guys win in the end. And how “love” and “romance” is more than drama and tears. Maybe we even see the reality of Belly’s “happiliy ever after” and we see her in her 50s, still babysitting the emotional child she married while Cam Cameron and his wife walk barefoot down the beach holding hands.
This is why dads shouldn’t watch teen romance. Team Cam Cameron for life.
